I am not a relationship expert. Let me repeat, I AM NOT A RELATIONSHIP EXPERT. I am also not a dating coach or married. But I do know a few things about dating in the city. And with cuffing season quickly approaching, you will have to make some changes if you don’t want to get snowed in alone, again.
1. Leave the house
I know this seems like common sense but all sense ain’t common. Going straight home after work every day or binge watching Netflix on a Saturday night while texting your bestie about her adorable new baby will not get you a boo.
2. Don’t turn your nose up at online dating or social media hookups
I know plenty of people (yes Black people) who have met their mate on the world wide web. There are plenty of dating apps that are viable options for meeting someone new from the safety of your smartphone. Think about it this way, how you met is only the first chapter in a love story. It’s the other stuff that really counts. Still not comfortable? Just lie and say you met him at a bar.
3. Day parties are not the only answer
We all know that MUST LOVE BEARDS bring the boys to the yard. But it’s still difficult to strike up a conversation while getting turned up. Try a few quieter event options to connect.
4. Stop hanging out with your girls
You love them. Hell I love mine too! But if you keep going out with the same people to the same places your chances of meeting someone new are very low.
5. Roll solo dolo
It takes a lot of courage to approach a lovely lady in the middle of a party. It’s 10 times worse, when he has to break through the girlfriend barrier and endure side eyes just to say “hello.” Make it a tad easier and go out alone every once and a while. This is a tough one for me too. My cheat is to arrive early to wherever my friends and I are meeting, bag some numbers and then chill with the girls.
6. Put your phone down
No seriously, you won’t die, I promise. Leave the iMan in your purse and give a real one some attention.
7. Be nice to everyone
He’s not “future husband potential.” So what! His friend, co-worker, or teammate might be. You never know who someone can introduce you to, be pleasant so they refer you.
8. Don’t scowl
Yes I know. I hate it when people tell me smile more too. But a recent Google Hangout with my friend Dennis, made me re-think some thangs.
In my defense, I wasn’t clutching my bag, simply holding it. But you do catch more flies with honey #imjustsayin
9. Make new friends
That other Black girl in the office that invited you to her game night but you’ve always had something better to do? Yeah her. Next time she extends the offer, go, be merry, and bond! Joining a co-ed professional organization or sports team will also help.
10. Go out without an agenda
It’s an unconventional idea lol but try going out without the sole purpose of meeting a man. Take the worry and stress out of it, you’ll have more fun and less wrinkles.
Did I forget anything? Let me know in the comments section below!