Home I AM NOT A RELATIONSHIP EXPERT 10 Ways to Meet Young Black Professional Men
10 Ways to Meet Young Black Professional Men

10 Ways to Meet Young Black Professional Men

I am not a relationship expert. Let me repeat, I AM NOT A RELATIONSHIP EXPERT. I am also not a dating coach or married. But I do know a few things about dating in the city. And with cuffing season quickly approaching, you will have to make some changes if you don’t want to get snowed in alone, again.

1. Leave the house


I know this seems like common sense but all sense ain’t common. Going straight home after work every day or binge watching Netflix on a Saturday night while texting your bestie about her adorable new baby will not get you a boo.

2. Don’t turn your nose up at online dating or social media hookups


I know plenty of people (yes Black people) who have met their mate on the world wide web. There are plenty of dating apps that are viable options for meeting someone new from the safety of your smartphone. Think about it this way, how you met is only the first chapter in a love story. It’s the other stuff that really counts. Still not comfortable? Just lie and say you met him at a bar.

3. Day parties are not the only answer


We all know that MUST LOVE BEARDS bring the boys to the yard. But it’s still difficult to strike up a conversation while getting turned up. Try a few quieter event options to connect.

4. Stop hanging out with your girls


You love them. Hell I love mine too! But if you keep going out with the same people to the same places your chances of meeting someone new are very low.

5. Roll solo dolo


It takes a lot of courage to approach a lovely lady in the middle of a party. It’s 10 times worse, when he has to break through the girlfriend barrier and endure side eyes just to say “hello.” Make it a tad easier and go out alone every once and a while. This is a tough one for me too. My cheat is to arrive early to wherever my friends and I are meeting, bag some numbers and then chill with the girls. 

6. Put your phone down


No seriously, you won’t die, I promise. Leave the iMan in your purse and give a real one some attention.

7. Be nice to everyone


He’s not “future husband potential.” So what! His friend, co-worker, or teammate might be. You never know who someone can introduce you to, be pleasant so they refer you.

8. Don’t scowl


Yes I know. I hate it when people tell me smile more too. But a recent Google Hangout with my friend Dennis, made me re-think some thangs.

10 Ways to Meet Young Black Professional MenIn my defense, I wasn’t clutching my bag, simply holding it.  But you do catch more flies with honey #imjustsayin

9. Make new friends


That other Black girl in the office that invited you to her game night but you’ve always had something better to do? Yeah her. Next time she extends the offer, go, be merry, and bond! Joining a co-ed professional organization or sports team will also help.

10. Go out without an agenda


It’s an unconventional idea lol but try going out without the sole purpose of meeting a man. Take the worry and stress out of it, you’ll have more fun and less wrinkles.

Did I forget anything? Let me know in the comments section below!

Genese Jamilah Genese Jamilah is the I DON'T DO CLUBS Founder and New York City Influencer. She is a graduate of Savannah State University. Genese Jamilah enjoys writing things down & making them happen, dinner & drinks with friends, and sharing inappropriate memes in her free time. Follow her @idontdoclubs on FacebookInstagramSnapChat, and Twitter.


    1. Just curious…but do men really need help meeting young black professional women?

      Love the list! I’d definitely include spending more time at unconventional places like Trader Joes, museum, gym, etc. You’d be surprised what you encounter in the beer aisle or in the weight room 🙂

      1. Absolutely. Meeting Black Professional woman in this city is just as tough even for attractive men. I actually find that black woman are less open to interact with men at events or in public even when approached in a respectful manner.

  1. # 04 , # 05 , & # 09 are so true I am meeting more guys by smiling more :):):):) and rolling alone . And it doesn’t hurt to be nice to people . Its amazing 🙂

    1. I think if you smile more and roll solo. I’m more likely to spark up a convo. Give us more of a sign to let us know your interested or simply take matters into your own hand and approach us. I promise you wont be looked at as “Thirsty!”

  2. The rolling alone is a tough one but I am finding that if I don’t start to do so I’m going to miss out. Waiting on your girlfriend to commit to plans to hang is getting real old. Any suggestions of where and some things to keep in mind when stepping out solo for the first timer?

    1. I don’t think its always necessary to roll solo. Just break up the dreaded woman circles that block everyone else out. Open up. Mingle. Occasionally separate from the large group of girls so it’s easier for men to approach. Rejection is tough. But it’s even tougher when you get rejected by the group.

  3. i can attest to the rolling dolo. i work odd hours so i often go places, solo and I always meet men and I know it’s because it’s easier to approach a women by herself. If i sit anywhere for more than 15mins, someone always approaches me, they are curious to ask where your girlfriends are. or if you order something interesting. once i ordered jamesonon the rocks and the guy next to me, turned around and said really? lol

  4. You are keeping it real! I find it that most women/men are embarrassed to say they met online? I am not sure why? They way social media is taking off it seems like everyone is online. I think of online dating as shopping if you see something you like then you pick it out and buy it, once you get home you realize its not your style you take it back and get your money back LOL .

  5. Also you should join some professional organizations and attend their career events (whether you’re looking for a new career or not). Like the Black MBAs (you don’t have to have an MBA ladies!) just attend their events and use #1 – #10 above. They have the Black Engineers NSBE Black IT BDPA, Black journalists NABA, Black lawyers and architects etc. Go prowl!

  6. Genese – you are right on the money. Number #7 is really important. I too had to work on my mean face (when relaxed). Overall, I tend to demonstrate numbers 1,4,5,7,8,9,10 more comfortably/frequently. I have also found, that beyond meeting a man (a single man, I might add), you learn soooo much about yourself!!

    Has anyone considered going to places we know professional men go?? Sporting events (get season tickets), go to a golf course…even though you might not know how to swing…someone might walk over and teach you, an auction, charity event (ticket $50-100) and as Steve Harvey suggests just walk up and down a hardware store (intentionally appearing to be lost). I haven’t tried any of these…would I be crazy and desperate if I admitted I did?

    I saw someone made a comment about wanting a list for the men…Men, just do the same thing. Go places we might go to…pull a number #5 as Genese suggested us to do.


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